THE POWER OF I & YOU

A few days ago, I was invited to speak at the Rotary Club Majesty in Jaipur on the topic "Communications & Connections". Here is a little round up of that talk. I am greatly indebted to Ms. Nicole Hanry of AMICITIA to have supplemented this session with her expertise. Ms Nicole, with a Ph.D in Communications, has been working as a Communications Consultant in France for almost three decades now.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, what is life but Communicating and Connecting. From material to the spiritual, from atomic to the cosmic, its about communicating and connecting. Every little being is in connection with another: cells connect to form life, atoms connect to form our surroundings. Inside the atoms, the tiny little neutron, protons and electrons are all communicating and connecting. This act of connecting is what leads to an atomic explosion too!

On a lighter note, a being is conceived and the brain communicates to the body, the body to the mother, the mother to the family around her- someone's arriving! A child is born; begins communicating immediately- starts crying for love, comfort and food. The mother communicates back- extends her bodily warmth and begins nursing. Their first exchange of love, care and trust. Repeats it for a month and this connection is termed " bonding".

The basis of any relationship is a few emotions and to understand how those emotions are conveyed is really no rocket science. How do you know your neighbor next door is friendly? A smile, I guess. Let us explore the dynamics in Communications.

7% words, 38% Tone & 53% Body language

And you thought, you talked and that's how you impressed. Well, there was much more than " before you talked" too or "while you talked". One thing I love about Toronto is " Smile Exchanges". You cross paths with someone during morning walk, you enter a convenient store, you board a local bus, you get into the elevator....a 1000 instances every day and you generously offer a smile.

An acknowledgement, a sign of respect or care, a sign of welcome, transmitting cheerfulness to the world around- I smile. I am powerful. I've the capability to communicate my cheerfulness or my indifference to the world around. Only if I realize the power I have.

Continuing with our faith in the power of I, let's shift our focus to You.

What I want to say is related to what you want to hear. Whatever our communication is, we must remember the I and YOU factor.

As kids, we pressurized our parents to buy us presents, convinced our teachers of our innocence amidst fights; in our professional life, we learned how to sell a product to our customer. We developed our own style of communicating, we learned to balance the I & YOU. In order to connect, we must never loose sight of YOU.

And next, must remember the HOW and WHAT. How do I say a certain thing, how do I communicate- phone or face-to-face; what do I say that binds a relationship, what do I say so I can save my face today - the instances are endless.

Dear friends, with these few ideas, I will wind up my talk and request Nicole Hanry to share her wisdom with you. Subsequently, the floor will be open for questions."

We indeed had all types of questions from the audience- housewives and professionals- all had their own issues with miscommunications and misunderstandings. It was a very interesting session. I learnt a lot too!